Coaching and the 3Ps
Coaching and the Three Principles
Coaching has a different feel when you start to share The Three Principles. Coaches can feel a bit uncomfortable as their style of coaching starts to shift. There is no ‘how to’ guide on the best way to develop as a Three Principles coach – you can only do your best. If you are not clear about what is meant by The Three Principles, here is an article called: What are the Three Principles?. You might find it useful to download an introduction to the Three Principles here.
The state of confusion and anxiety
Many coaches experience confusion and some anxiety as they shift towards coaching and the 3Ps. From being an expert in traditional coaching, they find themselves in a no-man’s-land. It no longer feels authentic to coach as they used to and yet their understanding is not solid enough to make the transition completely as a Three Principles Coach.
What’s the answer? The answer is to look towards your own wisdom. It is a good idea to ‘trust’ in the moment within each individual coaching session. Sometimes this might mean sharing your understanding or insights about the 3Ps.
Your wisdom might also draw you to share traditional coaching tools and techniques. The most important thing is to be present with your client. Your ‘role’ is to be access your truth and wisdom – in doing so you enable your client to access their own wisdom.
Keep developing your understanding
The key difference with the 3Ps is that there is no training, reading or learning to do (in the traditional sense). Often you will find yourself in a dilemma. You will want to develop your knowledge, however the traditional methods won’t work, your best bet is to keep your antennae tuned to the Three Principles.
There is a difference between trying to learn something and absorbing and being around something. There are lots of great videos and books (try the threeprinciplesmovies for a great resource). There are DVDs and books of Syd Banks which are also great to get hold of. Developing your understanding of the Three Principles is a bit like growing a plant from seed.
Once the seed is planted you are best to keep it nourished and leave it alone. It’s the same with the 3Ps – keep in the conversation and notice when you feel frustrated (and you will) and notice when you feel peaceful (which you will too). Your understanding can’t help but develop.
Don’t count up your insights
In the Three Principles community the term ‘insight’ is used for a deepening of an understanding. There are times when everyone around you appears to be lighting up with one insight after another and you aren’t. It can feel as though there is a bit of a competition going on about who has the deepest understanding of the Three Principles.
Insights are not things to collect. Insights occur even when you don’t intellectually realise they are happening. Sometimes insights are like tiny effervescent bubbles fizzing inside you. There are no words you can put to them, you just feel good. If you stay around the Three Principles you can’t help but grow.
There are some plants that shoot up, there are others that grow slow. Some people will get flashes of insight of deep understanding, others get the odd glimpse. It’s not a race, enjoy the journey.
It’s absolutely fine if you are feeling a bit wobbly and confused as you make the transition into the Three Principles as a coach. There isn’t a ‘right’ way to go. It is likely to feel counter- intuitive when you realise there is nothing to ‘do’ and nothing you can ‘do’ to speed up the process. Keep reading, listening to videos and being around the Three Principles conversations.
About the author
Liz Scott is the co-founder of Coaching Connect and runs a business (with her husband Stuart Newberry) called Liz Scott Coaching & Training. Liz is a coaching skills trainer and a leadership coach. Her passion is to bring the skills of coaching (and the understanding of the 3Ps) into schools. Download an introduction to the Three Principles here.